ENFJs give and understand more regarding people with little effort but deep down will always go to logic ie cut and run.
So, ISTP goes to Fe and loyalty even when it's stupid stipulated it's the correct bond - even without hope. ENFJ goes to ti logic and will cut ties when the relationship fails the logic test can be overcome with correct future vision - and hope. There is a beauty to the reverse dynamic, just being aware of how you naturally respond - you can correctly predict the other is struggling with the inverse issue which you also struggle with at different times for different triggers -. It's amazing and strong but isn't for everyone, especially the immature.
Last edited by Gilly; at Sponsored Links Remove Advertisements. My best girl friend growing up was ISTP.go site
I think we really balanced each other out. She could tell me I was blowing things out of proportion and being ridiculous sometimes in a matter-of-fact, not mean way and I would never get offended. We always had fun together. Originally Posted by Gilly. Last edited by Loaf; at It's like, I feel like I can't influence his weak Fe either way so I don't bother trying. We just let each other be. I let him be the boss and he lets me come and go as I please.
I think he may have some issues with his Se though. So that might be why. Last edited by wums; at One of my best friends since I dunno He's a gay guy and yeah, we are sorta opposites but the amazing thing is we click well together.
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As for the romance thing, I'm not so sure. This was before I got married, of course. Gilly is very right on ISTPs, tho. They will feel pressured if you expect them to behave a certain way. He likes his solitude as well. He has a huge circle of friends too. When he dropped me home, he would always make sure I am safe. I guess not all ISTPs are alike. But something I noticed is that how he enjoyed our comfortable silence when we both ate together everyday.
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Where do you want to go? Did some shit happen to you,etc? It can be as simple as "Come with me! Lol Though at times I do ask him what does he want. And that is probably key to a good bond. Like say, for us, we obviously prefer to talk to our loved ones daily spouse, gf, bf but for the ISTP, from what I've seen so far, they don't need that so much.
They'll be fine left alone while you the ENFJ wonders about them. But one of the best things about them is they don't take things personally. They aren't as sensitive to hurt or a difference of opinions as FJs. They'll probably forgive us faster than we to them. I understand that not all ISTPs are like this tho. They are also the doers who ensure that things work or go they way they do.
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Oh yah, and the ISTP, they might probably not admit that they can feel lonely. He was actually lonely without me at work.
Of course he still worked professionally tho. And in his love life too, I noticed this similar theme. They like to listen to other people's views, but are generally non-commital about expressing their own opinions.
ISTPs have a habit of evading answering questions by asking more questions. This can be frustrating at times to their mates, if they are after a direct answer. The ISTP's decision making process is entirely internal, so they don't feel much need to share their opinions with others.
When they are interacting with others, they are in "information gathering" mode, so they tend to ask questions rather than share views. The ISTP just doesn't feel the need to expose themselves fully to others. When it comes to intimate relationships, the ISTP has the further motivation of protecting themselves. Most ISTPs are afraid of having to deal with their deeper feelings. Since their Thinking preference dominates their personality, their Feeling side is their least developed inferior function. Consequently, ISTPs are usually quite vulnerable and perhaps weak when dealing with their feelings.
Their habit of keeping part of themselves hidden may also serve the purpose of keeping a protective wall around their hearts. Although the ISTP does not usually have a well-developed Feeling side, they frequently do have intense feelings for people. They can feel overpowering love for their mates, although they are likely not to express their emotions, or to express them inadequately or inappropriately if they do venture towards expression.
However, unlike many of the other personality types, ISTPs feel strong affections one day at a time. One day, they may feel completely, intensely in love with their mate, and the next day they may be totally disinterested, or perhaps even ready to move on. This "live for the moment" type of approach is different from how most other types experience their feelings, and is difficult for many to understand. Consequently, the ISTP may be called "fickle" or "cold".
In fact, they are not really fickle, and certainly not cold. They simply experience their lives on a moment by moment basis, and go along with it's natural flow. However, since most people need more commitment than can be offered when taking things day-by-day, the ISTP who wants to remain in a relationship will have to resolve themself towards being involved in a more traditional commitment. For most ISTPs, making a commitment to an intimate relationship will require an effort to stretch themselves outside of their comfort zones.
ENFJ and ISTP – Compatibility, Relationships, and Friendships
However, those who do so will realize that they can enjoy the benefits of a strong, committed relationship and still live their lives in the present tense. ISTP's dominant function of Introverted Thinking is best matched with a partner whose personality is dominated by Extraverted Thinking. How did we arrive at this? Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness; For even as He loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable.
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Their dislike of being controlled or controlling others extends to their children as well, and they're consequently likely to give their kids a lot of breathing room and space for individual growth. However, when discipline is required, the ISTP will be able to administer it without too much difficulty.
They may have difficulty mustering up the enthusiasm to discipline their kids, but once they get going they'll be effective. ISTP parents are likely to maintain a distance between themselves and their children. They do not feel a tremendous need to pass on their values to their children, or to influence their decisions in life.
They're likely to rely on their mates for creating a structured environment for their children to live within. ISTPs do not like to be directed or controlled, and are not likely to direct and control others - including their children. They're likely to be relatively uninvolved with the daily happenings of family life, without making a conscious effort to keep interested. ISTPs will enjoy spending one-on-one time with their children pursuing outdoorsy activities, such as fishing, boating, hunting, etc.